


solace my game

by merriell



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-27
Updated: 2013-10-27
Packaged: 2017-12-30 15:18:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1020242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/merriell/pseuds/merriell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He wished he could look her in the eyes, and asked her why.</p>
            </blockquote>





	solace my game

**Author's Note:**

> i haven't read any of the manga so this is purely based on my knowledge of the anime, so mistakes will probably ensues!! sorry for that. C:

He stared at her.

She looked like a flower like this, encased behind her crystal with her eyes closed, instead of fire, which he always believed she was, burning every single person who dared to come close with her sparks. The taste of faint sadness in the back of his tongue are strange. He shouldn’t be feeling this kind of coldness pooling away on his chest to a traitor, to someone who had killed plenty of people just by a flick of her finger, but he did feel it, just feel it, somehow, although his common sense told him not to, and he’d hate himself more if he could.

He remembered her words, something that had been gnawing a part of his mind for a long time, times when he was alone and trying to lull himself to sleep, but he couldn’t, because there was monsters behind his eyelids. Times when he was picking up his pen, trying to capture the darkest parts of his minds no one could touch, but disturbed by her words to him, the way her face looked from the place where his feet touched the ground.

Ever since the knowledge of what lay between her undisturbed, ice-cold expression and what was within her mind was exposed to him, he realized, without him knowing, the way he looked at her was different—but that was inevitable. She was an enemy, she was a reason people died when all they wanted to do was survive in this world, to breathe without afraid that it will abruptly stop; to see what lay behind the walls they watched all their lives. How he longed to see the world that wasn’t limited on tall mountains of bricks.

“Why?” He found himself asking, the words slipping from his lips. “You should’ve—“

 _Should’ve what?_ He found his mind escaping him, for once. He didn’t even know why she’d done it, the inhumane qualities she bore on her heart. He wished he could’ve asked why she had done it; of a solid reason—if there was something like that—or just pure sheer mad happiness? He wished that there was no crystal encasing her body, separating her from the rest of the world, from him. He wished he could look her in the eyes, and asked her why.

But you couldn’t get all you want in a world where something simple as living your life normally without fear of real monsters that still live when you open your eyelids isn't possible.

“—stayed a good person to me, Annie,” Armin Arlert finally finished, and sighed, wishing that the woman in front of him stayed the way she was when he closed his eyes, instead of the one he saw when his eyes are open. But dreams are just dreams, and the real world was waiting beneath the thin ice of denial.


End file.
